mob incentive: Best one liner ever?

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Best one liner ever? (Completed)

Submitted by

notmikeweiss on Jun-29-2007 at 6:04:22 PM PDT

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In search of the best really short joke ever. So far my leader is:

Question: What did the zero say to the eight?
Answer: Nice Belt.

As you can see, corny counts in my books.

Tags (add): humor (1) jokes (1)

Rating:

(4.00)

Expiration Date: Jul-8-2007
View Count: 1829

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Outcome: Completed

Judged by

notmikeweiss

Congratulations. Even though it pains me to make the $100 winner the champion of this contest, I'm a sucker for the tennis joke...

Winning Solution:
Solution #7 submitted by venulia on Jun-30-2007

Ooh, this one:

Never marry a tennis player, love means nothing to them.

:)

Rejected Solutions:

Solution #1 submitted by alexis on Jun-29-2007

Solution #2 submitted by alexis on Jun-29-2007

Solution #3 submitted by Nick on Jun-30-2007

Solution #4 submitted by andrew on Jun-30-2007

Solution #5 submitted by Todd on Jun-30-2007

Solution #6 submitted by venulia on Jun-30-2007

Solution #8 submitted by wadesgirlie on Jul-2-2007

Solution #9 submitted by Colin on Jul-2-2007

Solution #10 submitted by alexis on Jul-3-2007

Solution #11 submitted by andrew on Jul-3-2007

Solution #12 submitted by ohsusanna on Jul-3-2007

Solution #13 submitted by naptime96 on Jul-3-2007

Solution #14 submitted by ayeshac on Jul-3-2007

Solution #15 submitted by notmikeweiss on Jul-4-2007

Comments (add a comment)

Solution Submitted on 7/4/2007 12:56:54 PM

notmikeweiss submitted a solution. Click here to rate the solution or add comments.

Of course I'm not going to dub myself the winner, but the best one line joke ever is:

How do you fit an elephant into a zip-lock bag?

Take the "f" out of "safe" and the "f" out of "weigh"

Solution Submitted on 7/3/2007 9:39:16 AM

ayeshac submitted a solution. Click here to rate the solution or add comments.

The dyslexic walked into a bra.

(no offense to dyslexic people)

Solution Submitted on 7/3/2007 1:02:18 AM

naptime96 submitted a solution. Click here to rate the solution or add comments.

Q: Why did the girl fall of the swings?
A: Because she had no arms!

Solution Submitted on 7/3/2007 12:42:52 AM

ohsusanna submitted a solution. Click here to rate the solution or add comments.

I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.

Solution Submitted on 7/3/2007 12:34:24 AM

andrew submitted a solution. Click here to rate the solution or add comments.

I'm surprised we haven't gotten into any blonde jokes... I'll start it up:

Q: What is a brunette's mating call?
A: "Is the blonde gone yet?"

Solution Submitted on 7/3/2007 12:07:08 AM

alexis submitted a solution. Click here to rate the solution or add comments.

Okay, I'm not sure what this says about me, but I love this joke:

Q: Why did the frog cross the road?
A: Because it was stapled to the chicken.

Solution Submitted on 7/2/2007 4:19:52 PM

Colin submitted a solution. Click here to rate the solution or add comments.

My all time favorite corny joke:

What do you call cheese that doesn't belong to you?

Nacho cheese!

Solution Submitted on 7/2/2007 12:12:39 AM

wadesgirlie submitted a solution. Click here to rate the solution or add comments.

Why didn't the chicken wear pants?

...because his pecker is on his head!

Solution Submitted on 6/30/2007 6:19:32 PM

venulia submitted a solution. Click here to rate the solution or add comments.

Ooh, this one:

Never marry a tennis player, love means nothing to them.

:)

Solution Submitted on 6/30/2007 6:08:32 PM

venulia submitted a solution. Click here to rate the solution or add comments.

Why was the mushroom invited to the party?

Because he was a fungi...

Added by venulia on 6/30/2007 5:35:00 PM

Rating: 1

nuh uh... you did not

Solution Submitted on 6/30/2007 1:22:21 PM

Todd submitted a solution. Click here to rate the solution or add comments.

No, no, no...the joke is:
Celine Dion walks into a bar. The bartender asks her, "Why the long face?"

Solution Submitted on 6/30/2007 12:18:14 PM

andrew submitted a solution. Click here to rate the solution or add comments.

I hope somewhat tasteless jokes allowed...

Q: What did Mr. Spock find in the toilet of the Enterprise?
A: The captain's log

Solution Submitted on 6/30/2007 8:39:02 AM

Nick submitted a solution. Click here to rate the solution or add comments.

Just heard this on Wait Wait Don't Tell Me:

A neutron walks into a bar, orders a beer, and asks the bartender "What do I owe you?" The Bartender replies "For you, no charge."

Solution Submitted on 6/29/2007 10:32:33 PM

alexis submitted a solution. Click here to rate the solution or add comments.

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked "Why the long face?".

Solution Submitted on 6/29/2007 10:32:06 PM

alexis submitted a solution. Click here to rate the solution or add comments.

A guy walked into a bar. Ouch.

What is this?

Best one liner ever? (Completed)

Outcome: Completed

Comments (add a comment)

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